Wednesday, January 5, 2011
Making My Kids My Priority
Making my kids my priority
Well, here we are on day 3 of my New Year challenges and I feel like I’m only about 50% on the Challeng-O-Meter for challenge #1. When I was in school, 50% was a failing grade. So, now I have to actually sit down—while the kids are sleeping—and really search my heart for ways to make this work.
Today’s goal for myself is to try to connect with my kids’ hearts. What makes them happy? Yesterday I started by giving them chocolate milk for breakfast, instead of white milk or the dreaded (gasp) water. And we read from How to Train Your Dragon by Cressida Cowell. I thought that was a good way to start the day. They seemed to enjoy it.
The book starts out nothing like the movie. But, it was funny how the book actually related to things I was thinking about yesterday. In the book, the main character Hiccup has to train his dragon to hunt. But, he has a stubborn dragon, so nothing is working. The usual way to train a dragon is by yelling. If yelling doesn’t work, then YELL LOUDER. Hiccup decided to try a different approach. He was going to be as nice to the dragon as possible. I’m still waiting to see how that turns out. We’re only up to chapter 10.
But, it dawned on me that kids don’t respond to yelling either. Before I was a mother, I just knew that I wasn’t going to be one of those mothers who yelled at her kids. Boy, was I wrong!! So, now, maybe I’ll dig down deep and try to find my patience and try Hiccup’s approach. I’ll be the nicest mommy I can be and see if that helps. I’ll try to find out what makes my kids really happy (besides watching TV). And really, I know what they want—time with me. They don’t care if the house is clean. They don’t care if they can walk through their rooms. And they don’t care if we eat on paper plates every night of the week so that mommy has less dishes. They’d probably care if I gave away half of their clothes. I won’t do that. But, you get my point. All they want is time with mommy and daddy.
I read an e-book online a couple years ago. Unfortunately, I can’t remember what it was to give credit. But, the woman said her dad had a policy about what would happen if he was reading the paper and she needed him. At this point, I was thinking, he would say “Let me finish this part”—see where my mind goes? But no, she said that his policy was that he would put down the paper and see what she needed right then. Today, I will make that my policy and see how it improves my relationship with my kids.
What things do you think you could do to improve your relationship with your kids? I would love to know!
And for those of you following along, it will be day 2 of no TV. Wish me luck! And on a random note—I still can’t feel my tongue (wisdom teeth abstraction 2 weeks ago must have bruised a nerve).